


What Reflects in Ripples

by Aly_H



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: Before Iokath, Consular is not the Outlander, Gen, M/M, Panic Attacks, Post-KotFE, Pre-Relationship, These were just a pair of scenes that wouldn't leave my head but I'm pleased with how they came out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-04
Updated: 2017-11-04
Packaged: 2019-01-29 07:37:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12626262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aly_H/pseuds/Aly_H
Summary: Valirek Silver, Barsen'thor of the Jedi Order, was not someone that Arcann expected to come to call his friend and yet that is what happens in the Alliance.Val isn't the Outlander. The Alliance belongs to the Sith Inquisitor Darth Nox (Tusin Shade).Very pre-relationship. Just couldn't get these scenes out of my head even though I didn't plan on writing them or anything with this pairing really. (Woops).





	1. Chapter 1

It was a lucky shot brought on by a sudden bought of idiocy. Arcann knew it, the Commander knew it. Even the master of disaster, Theron Shan, himself could see that.

The injury wasn’t bad – he had fought through worse – but the Commander had ordered him back, and he had learned that arguing with that particular man was generally a _bad_ idea. The battle would be won with or without him, it was clean up wiping out one of the pockets of resistance still nominally loyal to Vaylin (the absence of a ruler for Zakuul made it look like an opportunity for the sharks that his family had always attracted).

He allowed himself to be directed to one of the waiting cots and a medical droid to look him over. The organic staff preferred to avoid him – only those that had been responsible for attending to Senya able to feign neutrality at his presence. Only a handful could affect true friendliness.

The Alliance feared him, those among its ranks distrusted and hated him.

It was not a surprise.

He consented when the perversely cheerful Imperial model medical droid asked if he could be sedated for treatment, closing his eyes as the drugs dragged him into sleep.

When his eyes opened next sunlight was filtering through one of the high windows, and for the first time in weeks it had not been the memory of his family that had dragged him crying out their names from his sleep.

Instead the Force felt calm and still, the gentle touch of cool water.

“You’re awake,” the voice made him look to the side.

One of the Jedi healers set aside his datapad to stand from his chair and check his vitals on the data display. The Force around them shifted and the sensation of calm drew back, wrapping itself around the Jedi like a cloak.

He knew the man by appearance – twice he had attempted to draw Senya from her coma and he had visited her frequently, though he seemed to always be leaving when Arcann arrived.

Arcann remembered noticing most clearly that the man never wore a lightsaber – even during Vaylin’s invasion the Jedi had used a blaster when he’d fought, not the laser swords associated with Force users.

“It would appear so.”

“Your vitals are good, and Doctor Elwin expects that so long as you don’t try to move around too much you should be healed completely by tomorrow,” the Jedi informed him. “Lord Beniko has asked that you be guarded while you are injured, for your protection.”

“I am not so weak as I cannot protect myself,” he growled.

“Of course not, but you _do_ appear weak enough to invite attack,” the Jedi replied, returning to his seat. “And if you were to injure one of the Commander’s people, even in self-defense, he will be forced to respond against you.”

The Zakuulan prince narrowed his eyes at the man who had already picked his datapad back up and was scrolling through it again.

The Jedi’s hair was white despite his young age – he didn’t look to be over thirty even. His eyes were silver gray. Thin, long-healed scars fractured like a piece of broken glass across his face and neck. They were too even, too deliberate to have been caused by some accident, for all their placement seemed random.

If the Jedi noticed Arcann’s observations he gave no sign of it.

“Your name,” Arcann started then stopped as the silver eyes lifted to his face. “I was wondering what it was.”

“Valirek,” he replied – Arcann could almost imagine there was an undertone of a laugh in his voice.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW: Panic attack

_Brother, don’t you love me_?

In the manner which only dream logic could explain the voices of his brother and sister had blended together. Echoing in his ears even after he had dragged himself, chest heaving from his bed and dressed.

The Commander had given him a small but private room on one of the base’s living levels. It had felt oppressive, like the narrow walls were closing in, trapping him in like a prison cell so he had dressed quickly and fled from it, not bothering to take his lightsaber with him.

Even at the late hour there were people about – from the nearest kitchen a flirty Kaasi accent was composing a truly terrible poem and being greeted by laughter, Lana Beniko was stifling a yawn as she headed for her bed after doubtlessly being up working with Theron Shan that late, one of the Mandalorian soldiers was carrying one of the Alliance’s smugglers over his shoulder as she laughed and he called her _riduur_ and told her she needed to get some sleep.

The base was full of vibrance and life.

The base was too noisy - too crowded.

He couldn’t breathe like this.

He hurried to the main level of the base, by-passing the Cantina by using the walkway though it meant that he was glanced by one of the Alliance's Sith and Theron as they shared a bottle of something while they sat on one of the crates.

He ignored the scars to the infrastructure the battle with Vaylin had left on this part of the base and hurried to take the lift down.

There was a shuttle pad out that particular lift but it would be empty except for the guard droids.

He turned off that path, instead going down the hill to the pool at the waterfall’s basin and sitting hard on the ground there.

He should have dressed warmer – he was shivering in the summer night air, wrapping his arms around himself so that the tips of his fingers dug into the flesh that wouldn’t stop trembling.

His chest and throat felt tight and raw. He could almost smell the scent of burning flesh – his arm, there was something wrong with his arm.

He could feel it burning again –

“Arcann,” the silver Jedi crouched in front of him, his voice calm and careful, he was within reach but he made no move to try to touch the man. “Arcann – can you hear me?”

His hearing was fine – his arm was hurt not his ears for all he could hear the blood pounding in them so loudly. He gave a jerky nod in reply, his throat burned too much to answer.

“Alright – can you breathe in for me? Deep,” the Jedi’s tone was reassuring.

“Arm,” he rasped instead. “Fire.”

“There is no fire,” the tone was gentle but firm. “You are having a panic attack.”

He shuddered, his heart was pounding too hard – he felt the fire and the heat again, he knew he was burning!

The rocks nearby trembled and the tree behind him groaned with the weight of the building Force. The Jedi’s eyes snapped briefly upwards as he heard a branch high above crack, it would have struck them had he not lifted his hand and deflected it away using the Force.

He was causing that, his fear was beginning to strip him of control, he was going to fall again.

His mother, the Commander – they were wrong. He was nothing but a monster. A cruel, empty man filled only with spite and envy like his father had always claimed.

“Arcann,” Valirek spoke again, and that time the Force shifted around him, some of the blinding panic bleeding off of Arcann’s thoughts in a way that didn’t feel natural. Like flames doused in water the emotions seemed to splutter.

The ground beneath him stopped trembling.

“Can you focus on breathing with me?” the Jedi kept his tone soothing, and this time Arcann obeyed.

The pain seeped away though he could still feel his body trembling, and he still felt too cold.

“What happened?” he asked, voice still as harsh as he felt brittle.

“You had a panic attack,” the Jedi repeated, sitting back a little, his voice a little less steady than before, the set of his shoulders tenser like he expected trouble still. “This hasn’t happened before?”

He shook his head.

“Alright – what do you need right now?” Valirek asked, his presence in the Force pulling back again. The waters retreating but the fire was no longer raging out of control.

“I…does this mean I am returning to my old ways? That I will fall again?”

“It simply means you had a panic attack, Arcann,” the Jedi shook his head. “It’s not indicative of your morality or worth.”

That wasn’t true. Those here in the Alliance that did real good, he knew they wouldn’t become a danger to others simply because they were a little afraid. He stayed quiet, turning his eyes onto the waterfall, watching the way the lights from the base above caught and reflected in the rippling pool.

He had once been a man the whole galaxy feared now – the only threat to his power his father’s ghost and now he couldn’t even sleep through a night.

“What did you do?” he asked at last. “I felt the Force move.”

“I am sorry for that,” he bowed his head. “I would not have done so except I was afraid you might injure yourself.”

Arcann nodded a little, and turned his eyes back to the waterfall. He couldn’t help but think that his sister would have loved Odessen’s wilds when she was younger. Thexan would have enjoyed the company of those assembled here – his brother belonged far better in this strange assortment of heroes the Commander had gathered to him.

“Will you stay – just for a little while?” he asked the Jedi. He expected the man to leave now that he was calm – there was no immediate danger of his losing control.

The Jedi gave a nod and the same gentle smile as before, “Of course – however long you like.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading - if you enjoyed or would like to see more of Arcann and Val please let me know in the comments.
> 
> I didn't actually PLAN on writing anything for these two so I don't have anything planned for the future with them either. I just think these two would fit well together.
> 
> EDIT: So, I decided that I'd like to do a proper multi-chapter with these two but I want to see what Bioware gives us as canon first. Keep an eye out for it. ^^


End file.
